WASHINGTON (DC)
Religion News Service
April 8, 2019
By David Clohessy
When I told my wife that the Rev. Gary Hayes had passed away, she quickly walked across the room, hugged me and quietly said, “I remembered him holding our babies. So much love.”
Gary, the first Catholic priest to speak openly about the sexual abuse he had suffered as a young person, passed away last week at age 66 from cancer. He will be remembered as a dogged advocate for other survivors, but those who knew him will have memories of a man who, though wounded, was more giving than most people who had been through less.
In 1993, with the help of attorney Steve Rubino, Gary filed the first-ever lawsuit charging Catholic officials with racketeering. The Rev. Joseph McGarvey and the Rev. William O’Connell repeatedly molested Gary and two other boys, “conspiring to create a sex ring of children that could be sexually abused by the two priests and other priests,” often taking the kids across state lines “for the express purpose of having forcible sexual contact” with them, the suit said.
Though we were basically neophytes at talking to the media, Gary and I organized news conferences in Camden, N.J., where he had grown up, and in Philadelphia to address the case. Facing dozens and dozens of reporters, Gary stood between his mother and me and softly uttered a line that still brings goosebumps to my skin today.
“I am here seeking justice in the courts because I could find no justice in my church,” he said.
From that day forward, Gary was a dedicated survivor-activist. With every new mean-spirited comment or move Gary endured, I remember being shocked and thinking, “If they treat one of their own so viciously, imagine how they’ll treat a survivor who is not ordained.” Long after he had settled his case, he continued to be shunned by other clergy, but he persevered with grace and determination.
At the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops meeting in Texas in 2002, Gary was a much-sought-after interviewee. He was blunt and biting, with no airs, affectations or posturing — just straightforward and prophetic insights that made all of the victims who attended proud to know him.
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