FAIRBANKS (AK)
Daily News Miner

January 19, 2019

By Helen Renfrew

When it comes to fighting Alaska’s epidemic of child abuse and sexual assault, silence isn’t the answer. Webs of secrets trap survivors and protect perpetrators. Let me be clear: Survivors get to decide when, how and to whom they tell their stories. They went through an experience where they were unable to control what happened to their bodies, but they should be in complete control over how their story is told. As a society we are responsible for creating an environment where it is safe for survivors’ stories to be told, one that doesn’t blame them for what someone else did to them.

We need to believe them.

National and local media reported on numerous perpetrators over the last year: Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein, Larry Nassar, Catholic Jesuit priests throughout Alaska and Peter Wilson, who has been accused in Kotzebue to name a few. All of these cases have silence, sometimes decades of silence, in common. Victims feel embarrassed, ashamed and guilty; if they don’t talk about it, they can try to pretend it didn’t happen. Quite often the surrounding community knows what’s going on, but it’s an uncomfortable topic, and no one wants to be the first to mention it. Silence allows offenders to continue assaulting and abusing victims.

A family member raped me when I was 10. He raped a close relative 20 years later. He was arrested five years after that. I was not his first victim. The family knew — after all, most of them had been abused by their father, my grandfather. Keeping silent was a family tradition. How many dozens of children did my uncle victimize over those 25 years? How much damage did he cause? To this day, there are still members of my family who use coercion and guilt to try to keep the secrets hidden.

Note: This is an Abuse Tracker excerpt. Click the title to view the full text of the original article. If the original article is no longer available, see our News Archive.

FAIRBANKS (AK)
Daily News Miner

January 19, 2019

By Helen Renfrew

When it comes to fighting Alaska’s epidemic of child abuse and sexual assault, silence isn’t the answer. Webs of secrets trap survivors and protect perpetrators. Let me be clear: Survivors get to decide when, how and to whom they tell their stories. They went through an experience where they were unable to control what happened to their bodies, but they should be in complete control over how their story is told. As a society we are responsible for creating an environment where it is safe for survivors’ stories to be told, one that doesn’t blame them for what someone else did to them.

We need to believe them.

National and local media reported on numerous perpetrators over the last year: Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein, Larry Nassar, Catholic Jesuit priests throughout Alaska and Peter Wilson, who has been accused in Kotzebue to name a few. All of these cases have silence, sometimes decades of silence, in common. Victims feel embarrassed, ashamed and guilty; if they don’t talk about it, they can try to pretend it didn’t happen. Quite often the surrounding community knows what’s going on, but it’s an uncomfortable topic, and no one wants to be the first to mention it. Silence allows offenders to continue assaulting and abusing victims.

A family member raped me when I was 10. He raped a close relative 20 years later. He was arrested five years after that. I was not his first victim. The family knew — after all, most of them had been abused by their father, my grandfather. Keeping silent was a family tradition. How many dozens of children did my uncle victimize over those 25 years? How much damage did he cause? To this day, there are still members of my family who use coercion and guilt to try to keep the secrets hidden.

Note: This is an Abuse Tracker excerpt. Click the title to view the full text of the original article. If the original article is no longer available, see our News Archive.