NEW YORK
Buffalo News
By Mary Jo Noworyta
When I hear the media report a pastor’s sexual sin as an “affair,” it awakens a deep well of despair within me, remembering my own “brush with the devil.” Simple, lax descriptions such as, “falling from grace,” or “an act of indiscretion,” completely miss the mark on what is happening to religious communities throughout the world.
After my “indiscretion” with my pastor, I learned it was not an affair. There was no consent. It was merely an illusion of a consensual relationship when once we understand who is responsible to keep appropriate boundaries and why.
In every helping profession, the helpers are responsible to keep healthy boundaries between themselves and those they serve. One can argue that religious leaders are held to an even higher standard when you add the element of spirituality. By their very nature, they are representatives of God and hold a most sacred, trusted position.
An overwhelming majority of these leaders counsel those in their congregations. Those seeking help are the hurting, the confused, the broken, the lost; people without an answer looking for direction. The leader is fully accountable, working with the vulnerable and wounded. His sole purpose is to help. Never should he take advantage of the person under his care.
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