Former Wallabies star Tony Daly’s childhood sexual abuse led to drugs, booze, failed marriages and crime, by Danielle Gusmaroli, Daily Telegraph (March 22, 2017)

Former Wallabies star Tony Daly’s childhood sexual abuse led to drugs, booze, failed marriages and crime

FORMER Wallabies prop Tony Daly has revealed his relentless mission to become a World Cup-winning Aussie rugby star was fuelled by pent-up rage after he was sexually abused as a young boy by a Marist brother at one of Sydney’s most prestigious schools.

The 41-cap Australian front-rower lifted the lid on his abuse as an 11-year-old by a Catholic brother at the elite rugby nursery, St Joseph’s College, after detailing what happened at two assessment interviews with the Royal Commission.

The abuse revelations come as Daly avoided jail yesterday for petty thefts and driving offences — part of a rampage of drug and booze-fuelled robberies sparked by the demons of shame unleashed after his sporting career.

His spiral of self-loathing also included two failed marriages and the FBI frogmarching him off a plane in Los Angeles, after he allegedly stole a wallet and sunglasses from a passenger in 2009.

The reign of terror inflicted by the brother, who is still alive, only ended when Daly was 13 but the rugby legend, now 51, recalls the abuse “with crystal clear detail”.

The Sydney rugby veteran told The Daily Telegraph he was just a kid from West Pymble whose father and grandfather had attended the same school when the abuse started. He said it included “fondling” and “a clear breach of trust”.

“I was 11 at the time and didn’t know any better, for years I thought it was normal behaviour,” he said.

“The penny dropped a few years later when I realised I wasn’t attracted to men and thought, ‘hang on a minute, I’ve been had’.

“I was with a group of boys at school talking about chicks and footy and sex; it was subtle, I realised you weren’t supposed to do those things. I felt dirty, yucky, I felt betrayed and angry.

“I felt shame for years but on my last day at school, when I was 18 after sitting my HSC exam, I saw him, looked him straight in the eye and pointed at him as if to say, ‘I know exactly what you did’.

“I was a footballer then, not a scared, short, little fat kid with blond hair and he shit himself and ran away.”

A still furious Daly described the brother as “a bully and a f ... in’ pervert”.

"There was a lot of anger and I couldn’t face my demons for years so I’d have a thousand beers and take drugs to forget it. It took me two years to come off it and I finally did in 2013. TONY DALY"

“His Christianity doesn’t mean a thing. I’m a Catholic but because of what happened to me I’m now a submarine Catholic, I only come up and pray when I need help.

“The boarding school was the launch pad of what has gone wrong in my life. I’ve stuffed up two marriages, I was drinking a lot, abusing substances, I’ve been all over the shop for years.”

Mr Daly believes the brother’s crimes caused him to become suicidal and unable to form long-lasting relationships with women.

He has undergone lengthy stints of counselling at Adele House rehabilitation centre, is on antidepressants and believes he has developed an obsessive nature and low self-esteem as a result of his ordeal.

His retirement from professional football and representative rugby did not help.

He filled the void of being in the Wallaby wilderness with yet more binges, the last of which was in 2015, which unfortunately ended in yet another petty theft incident.

“I crashed and burned around 2003. The key for me staying normal is activity. I need to keep busy, otherwise someone like me with an obsessive nature gets into trouble,” he said.

“There was a lot of anger and I couldn’t face my demons for years so I’d have a thousand beers and take drugs to forget it. It took me two years to come off it and I finally did in 2013.”

Mr Daly is speaking out against the brother, now believed to be in his 90s, after giving evidence to the commission. His decision to do so is fuelled by the desire to explain his errant past to his 10-year-old daughter and to encourage other victims of sexual abuse at school to come forward.

“I’ve had this on my shoulders for 39 years and I want my little girl to realise I was sick at the time and that I’m sorry for my behaviour and I hope she and my family forgive me,” he said.

“People think I’m a macho bloke … I played front-row for Australia for 10 years so I must be cocky, but I have really low self-esteem.

“Would I have been as great a footballer had I not been abused? Probably not. I needed to prove to myself that I could be the best at something.”

Mr Daly played for Australia 41 times and in that time managed to win six of the 12 matches he played against the All Blacks. One of those victories came at the 1991 Rugby World Cup semi-final, a tournament in which Australia went on to win their first William Webb Ellis trophy.

These days he is coaching a Sydney rugby team and works as a business development consultant. Last year he was one of three ex-Wallabies voted No. 1 prop of all time in former Test centre Tim Horan’s all-time best Anzac XV.

St Joseph’s headmaster Ross Tarlinton said the school was unaware of any allegations regarding Mr Daly.

“These matters are handled by professional standards office of the Marist brothers,” he said.

FORMER Wallabies enforcer Tony Daly broke down in court yesterday as a magistrate referred to his alleged childhood abuse as the catalyst for petty thieving and driving offences.

Magistrate Vivian Swain told Sydney’s Downing Centre Court that prison was not the answer for the former Australian front-rower, after reading a report submitted from the Royal Commission detailing the abuse allegations and a character reference from friend and former Wallaby captain, Nick Farr-Jones.

The 51-year-old St Joseph’s old boy was sentenced to a total 500 hours community service and banned from driving for seven years for three counts of petty theft in 2015, driving while disqualified and injuring a cyclist in 2014, driving while disqualified in 2015 and not filing his statement of affairs after he was declared bankrupt last year.

He also failed to appear at Blacktown Local Court in October 2016 over the matters and was given an 18-month good behaviour bond.

Mr Daly wept silently as Mrs Swain told the court: “Mr Daly stands before the court today a very sad man, he had a very successful rugby career a long time ago but prior to that he suffered at the hands of an offender while a boarder at a school and this may go some way towards explaining his behaviour.

“He has an addiction problem with alcohol … but tellingly friends have told how he has changed significantly and admitted responsibility for his behaviour and what happened to him. Acceptance is key.”

His lawyer Tony Newton said Mr Daly was determined to change, and detailed his participation in an eight-week program with a support network for men who have been abused. Mr Daly has also spent the last two weeks at Adele House rehabilitation centre.