Back in the real world: An abuse survivor's journey

By Sarah Shands
ABC Newcastle
March 1, 2015

http://www.abc.net.au/local/audio/2015/03/02/4189654.htm?site=newcastle

Abuse survivor Stephen shares his Journey.

The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses into Child Sexual Abuse is the end of the road for one Newcastle man.

The man's name is Stephen (he doesn't want his surname revealed), and he was invited to share his story of abuse at a private hearing with the Royal Commission in Newcastle last week.

It's been a harrowing journey for the 66-year old, who said he suffered abuse at school in Adamstown from when he was 13-years old.

"Looking back 50 years I can see it really stuffed up my life," he said.

Stephen said abuse doesn't just affect the survivor but their entire extended family.

He said his former wife and his sons have been incredible supports during the journey.

"Moving through the process to reach the Commission has been one of total gratification for me - from meeting with the councillor from Zimmerman House to the police who handled the matter," he said.

Giving evidence at the Royal Commission is a different experience for every person and for Stephen it has provided closure on a very dark part of his life.

"One of the worst things about being a survivor of something like this is you feel like the guilty party. Any hearing like that has you feeling like you are the criminal," he said.

Stephen was encouraged to make recommendations to the commission to ensure what happened to him doesn't happen again to other young people.

The priest who allegedly abused Stephen was charged with the crimes but was too frail to travel from his interstate home to face court in Newcastle, so the case had to be dropped.

But despite what happened to Stephen he still struggles with blaming the alleged perpetrator.

"It can be impossible for some people to bring this experience into the open because while he was a paedophile he was also a bloody good teacher," he said.