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	We Need to Talk about Child Abuse in Columbus By Rev. Dennis McCarty The Republic November 26, 2011 http://www.therepublic.com/view/local_story/We_need_to_talk_about_child_ab_1322365840/ BACK when I studied for ministry, part of my training was a year's chaplain residency at a large hospital. One week in class, we had a serious discussion on childhood sexual abuse. Out of six chaplains, four had been touched by sexual abuse as kids. (Yes, I was one of them.) One more refused to talk about it. From what I saw then and after, I worry that child sexual abuse is drastically under-reported. Recent news headlines tend to confirm my suspicions. Within Catholic Church hierarchy, abuse cases are still playing out in Chicago, Philadelphia and Kansas City. Multiple U.S. Olympic coaches have just been dismissed for sexually abusing youngsters. South Carolina's military college, The Citadel, was just rocked by an abuse scandal. And of course, the Penn State University scandal fills the news. This stuff is all over. I've seen enough professionally right here in Bartholomew County — if we think we're exempt, we're kidding ourselves. We can't hide from this spiritual cancer. Or to put it differently — predators thrive when we let them hide from us. We need to take action to make it stop. But that means facing the uncomfortable topics of sex and sexual abuse. Discomfort is hard work. But the Penn State mess is what comes of not wanting to deal with the problem. Long after they had to know something was going on, administration and football staff still turned blind eyes. They just shuffled the person around. For at least 15 years, no one did the one thing that might actually have stopped the abuse: call police and keep yelling until the police came. These men were all good citizens. They were smart enough to know (you would think) that when the story did come out, their careers would be destroyed. Yet even after an official investigation started — two more years passed, and they still did little to protect the children, their university or themselves. That frightens me. It just proves how tempting it is to keep silent and how hard it is to speak out. See no evil. Hear no evil. Tell no secrets. If somebody does make a stink about it — just take the perpetrator's keys away. Or move him to a different job assignment. Or to a different parish. Acknowledging that a colleague or relative is abusing kids — is really uncomfortable. Thus, sexual abuse prospers. It will prosper until we face the discomfort. For starters, parents who really want to protect their kids, need to step up. They need to talk to their kids about sex in general and warn them about sexual abuse in particular. Let the kids know, they can ask hard questions and tell hard truths without getting punished or silenced — or ignored. And yes, we need functional sex education programs in school and in church. Abusers thrive on silence. Finally — all youth, high school and collegiate clubs and athletic programs need designated sexual abuse reporters. People trained to know what sexual abuse looks like, how to deal with it — especially, trained to take action when it happens. This is because it's just so very tempting for an average person to pretend not to see. This whole topic is, indeed, uncomfortable. But we need to look at it when we see it. And talk about it —with each other and with our kids—even when we don't see it. Better an uncomfortable conversation than a hurt child. Contact: columnists@therepublic.com
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