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	What's the Real Meaning of the Season? By Dr. Jaime Romo Healing and Spirituality December 6, 2010 http://www.jaimeromo.com/blog/archives/329 I saw a billboard this week that read, 'Jesus is the ONLY reason for the season.' This whole contest about reasons for this and every season makes me laugh. You've heard about the atheist group that put up a billboard in New Jersey that reads, 'You know it's a myth.' And then the Catholic League put up one that says, 'You know it's real.' These billboard theologies are more entertaining than meaningful when it comes to real issues like ending religious authority sexual abuse (RASA) and promoting healing for the generations who have known RASA. Does it really matter what we believe, if that does not lead to a concrete action? Particularly if what we believe is so wrapped up in sentimentality about the sacredness of children represented in the tragic nativity story that a god-child, magical in origin and spectacular in purpose would not be welcomed and left out in the cold. Well, that little child is alive today and has been abused and continues to be neglected by religious authorities and those who continue to focus on 'is the story true or not?' I think that a more useful question is 'What does it mean if the story is true?' or 'What does it mean if the story is a myth?' In either case, the implication is that we have a responsibility to live up to our best and highest potential and to extend safety and care to all around us, particularly children and vulnerable adults. A further implication is that we must speak up and intervene when church leaders do or have done wrong. This is what long time advocates like Gustavo Arellano, continue to do to expose and end RASA. There is finally a public move by some priests to speak up for survivors. Thank you. So, when Cardinal Mahony is invited to an Our Lady of Guadalupe celebration (the veracity of which is also contested), why is he not challenged by more people? When a new president of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops says that there is no crisis, why is he not challenged? When cases continue to come forward in so many states, what is a different response by those on either side of this Christmas theology to the question, 'what does it mean in action?' Not what does it mean in sentiment? More than likely there are many such children in your congregation; 1-4 girls, 1-6 boys are sexually abused by the time they are 18. Countless children witness domestic violence. Teens are involved in abusive relationships. These children may feel scared and alone. As they grow up they may have experience long term social, physical and mental problems. How can your church or synagogue or mosque or temple help? Clearly there is a problem, a crisis. Do you want to live in and have children live in a safe society that promotes healing for those impacted by sexual abuse? You can promote healing by taking action. The following statements relate to different levels of action to transform the hidden system and overt behaviors that perpetuate CSA. Which are next steps for you to take as an advocate or anti- abuse supporter? I must do more than trust the religious leaders to make policy changes. I must actively support survivors by my presence, and actions. I must educate myself about the experiences of CSA and speak up when I see or hear about inappropriate behaviors by members of churches, mosques, synagogues or temples. I must be willing to be uncomfortable and allow others to feel uncomfortable when faced with new, possibly unwelcome information about CSA in these settings. Mostly I must act like an adult—and expect others to be adult when areas that need change become obvious to me, or when policies are not adequate, or when policies are not followed. What other actions which are particular to your role or responsibilities in your church, mosque, synagogue or temple can you add to your list? What might be the consequence(s) of not taking action? Jaime Romo, Ed.D. , is the author of "Healing the Sexually Abused Heart: A Workbook for Survivors, Thrivers, and Supporters" and "Parents Preventing Abuse"
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