It's Not All Bad, by Alison Bezzina, Times of Malta, November 9, 2010

It's Not All Bad

By Alison Bezzina
Times of Malta
November 9, 2010

http://www.timesofmalta.com/blogs/view/20101109/alison-bezzina/it-s-not-all-bad

Let me start by saying that I am not sorry for being one of the most fervent writers dishing out frustration, anger and absolute disgust about the Church's sexual abuse cases.

There is absolutely no excuse nor justification for the fact that the case has been sitting pretty in the criminal and Church courts for seven years.

And no, I do not regret the debilitating venom with which I wrote about the scandal.

However, I do regret one thing. In my haste and fury, I temporarily forgot that the same home - St. Joseph Home in St. Venera – is, to this day, a home to kids in need, kids who for some reason or other, have found themselves out on the streets, or in despicable family situations.

Last week, when the Church's tribunal declared that the sexual abuse allegations were in fact founded, I was about to write yet another infuriated article about the frivolous ridiculousness of this announcement, but before I got a chance to sit down and form words out of my exasperation, I got a Facebook message from Fr. Frankie Cini - the current director and the only priest still involved in the running of St. Joseph's Home.

In an attempt to show me that the home still has a useful role in society, Fr. Frankie invited me over to have a look at the place. Although I had never assumed that all priests, in all homes, at all times, are sexual abusers, I knew that because of writers and journalists like me, people like Fr. Frankie Cini would have faced a mega backlash.

But despite the consequences that he had to face because of the likes of me, Fr. Frankie, or 'Dun', as he is endearingly referred to by the boys living at the institute, welcomed me with open arms. We sat in the lovely courtyard and soon started talking like long lost friends. "Ever since the sexual abuse story resurfaced last April, we've had to face incredible repercussions," Dun kicks off with a painful smile.

"At the moment there are a total of 16 boys aged between 8 and 15 who are living here. Some were moved here because they had outgrown other institutions, and I've also taken a couple in from Mount Carmel Hospital because it was not the ideal place for them; others have just been taken out of their family homes under care orders issued by the state, and a few were more recently brought in by their relatives due to untenable family circumstances," Fr. Frankie explains.

It was the evening of a school holiday and only very few of the children were home. Fr. Frankie explained that during weekends and holidays, most of the kids get to go to their families or to foster carers, but some unlucky ones remain there. "When only a few of them are left, we take them out of their flats and let them be together. Like that they have each other's company and don't feel too left out."

Fr. Frankie, took me around the building explaining what every section is used for, and I was utterly amazed at the sheer grandiosity of the space, the high ceilings, the wide corridors, the huge arches, and the vacant massive rooms. "The building was built many years ago, and was designed to home over 200 orphans in typical institutionalized regimes, but this is not what we want the home to be like today," he explains.

We finally got to the kids' sleeping quarters featuring colourful walls but downtrodden furniture reminiscent of the 1950s. As soon as the boys heard Frankie's voice, they rushed towards us, ignoring me completely, and vying for his attention. Wearing their pyjamas and indoor shoes, they chased after us asking, "Dun, can we go out tonight? Why don't you come play a game of billiards with us Dun? Is it true that you're going abroad? How long will you be gone for Dun?"

One of the boys, who has special needs, lunged towards Fr. Frankie and gave him a full blown bear hug. Frankie pushed him away slowly, trying his best not to hurt the boy's feelings. He then turned to me and with a perplexed look on his face asked, "what am I supposed to do when this happens? I know that there are rules against this and given what has happened in the past, and particularly in this home, a hug could very well be misinterpreted, but this child has already been deprived of attention and affection, he also has special needs, how am I supposed to shove him off without breaking his heart?"

Any visitor, in fact any sceptic like me, can see that the children are well taken care of, and that despite the shortage of staff, and the lack of funds, the children are very content. Of course one does not need to dig too deep to see the wounds of their previous lives - one of the young children for instance sports two massive scars at the back of his head, undoubtedly the result of massive head injuries sometime during his early childhood.

"Most of our children find it very hard to attach themselves to anyone," explains Fr. Frankie. "After being let down by those most close to them, they learn not to feel anything, in fact some of our children never let a tear drop."

In addition to having been abandoned or strapped from their families, these children also have to learn how to cope with living in institutions built for another time. These places were cold and unfriendly, with sleeping dorms to house dozens of boys at a time. Although in more recent years St. Joseph's home has undergone major restructuring which has made it more family like, it is now in desperate need for another upgrade.

Throughout the years, St. Joseph's Home has housed over 2,300 children. Some stayed for a few months and some for years seeking refuge from poverty, loss of parents and emotional distress. "Despite all that we had to go through this past year, we're planning ahead with a positive attitude," says Fr. Frankie. "We want the children to come home to a cosy and safe place, where they can experience living like a family. We know that nothing can replace their real family, but we can try to match the environment to that of a real home," he explains in between cracking jokes and playful teasing with the kids.

The good news is that despite the bad reputation that the home had to fight off, the state still recognizes it as one of the best children's homes on the island, and there is still a great need for it, in fact there are more children in need of a home than can be accommodated. For this reason a group of young entrepreneurs from all walks of life, have come together to pool their resources to make this happen.

A lot of financial help has already been sourced but they are now turning to the general public for assistance. "This is on behalf of children who have no voice in our society…" explains the Facebook Group created for this project (St. Joseph's Home – Independent Living Project). "They deserve to stay in places which are simple, comfortable and dignified. Your help will make sure that these children in care today, will get the best possible!"

After meeting with the children, I did feel a tinge of guilt for having put them back in a bad light when I wrote about the scandal, however I fervently believe that it was something that had to be done, because it was probably due to all the media pressure that finally the case seems to be moving forward.

Now it is time to look at the present and to do something about the future of these kids. If still in doubt I have posted a few photos here for you to see for yourselves http://www.alisonbezzina.com/st-joseph-home-boys/ Check out the plans for the place and should you choose to contribute, join the Facebook Group or email Fr. Frankie Cini on admin@stjoseph-home.com.

Let's make this happen! info@alisonbezzina.com