For Abuse Victims on Journey of Healing, an Emotional Encounter

By Abby Goodnough and Katie Zezima
New York Times
April 19, 2008

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/19/us/nationalspecial2/19victims.html?_r=2&ref=us&oref=slogin&oref=slogin

BOSTON — Cardinal Sean P. O'Malley had repeatedly urged Pope Benedict XVI to make Boston part of his visit to the United States, both to meet abuse victims and to foster healing in the Archdiocese of Boston, where the sexual abuse crisis in the Roman Catholic Church erupted in 2002.

The pope ruled out a visit to Boston. But several months later, in February, one of his emissaries asked the cardinal to find a handful of Catholics from the region who had been abused by priests and who were willing to meet with the pope.

"We proposed some things and they proposed some things," the Rev. John Connolly, a special assistant to Cardinal O'Malley, said on Friday. "But it was at the Holy Father's initiative that this happened. This was very much a personal initiative of his."

Father Connolly and Barbara Thorp, director of the Office of Healing and Assistance Ministry for the archdiocese, then took on choosing which victims the pope should meet. They sifted through hundreds of names, Ms. Thorp said, using a few criteria to make the "very, very difficult" decision.

"There are so many people that have been so hurt and would have loved the opportunity," she said. "But the Holy Father wanted the smaller number so he could have a more personal encounter with each of the people there."

All five of those chosen — Faith Johnston of Haverhill, Bernie McDaid of Peabody, Olan Horne of Lowell and two others who did not want their names publicly disclosed — had met with Cardinal O'Malley in the past and had "ongoing relationships" with archdiocesan officials, Father Connolly said.

"These are folks who, having had the courage to come forward and report what happened to them, also then stayed engaged with the office," he said. "It was clearly people we judged to be on a journey of healing."

At the same time, Father Connolly said, they sought people "who would be able to do something like this in the glare of what could be a very public spotlight."

The archdiocese did not try to restrict what the five could discuss with the pope, he said, pointing out that two of them, Mr. McDaid and Mr. Horne, had been openly critical of the church in the past.

"Those guys are always going to say what's on their mind," Father Connolly said, while adding that in their dealings with the church, Mr. McDaid and Mr. Horne had always been "respectful" and "socially adept."

In an interview, Mr. McDaid, 52, said that he received a call about two weeks ago from Ms. Thorp and Father Connolly, and that they met with him at a Cheesecake Factory restaurant at a mall in Burlington, Mass., and told him of the invitation.

"They said the Vatican wanted me to be one of the people invited," Mr. McDaid said. "I've been waiting seven years. I was ecstatic. I said, 'Let's go.' It was very surreal."

Ms. Johnston, 23, said in an interview that she was "flattered" and "scared" when she got the invitation. A priest in her hometown parish was convicted in 2003 of raping her when she was 15 and working on Saturdays in the church rectory. She is to be married in June and hopes to become an advocate for victims of sexual abuse.

"It came completely out of the blue," Ms. Johnston said of the invitation. "I jumped at it."

Mr. McDaid and Mr. Horne, 48, knew each other before the meeting but met Ms. Johnston and the other two victims last weekend, over pizza at Cardinal O'Malley's home. They flew to Washington on Wednesday with a few of their relatives, Father Connolly and Ms. Thorp.

There were no "pope-meeting lessons," Ms. Thorp said. Ms. Johnson asked how to address the pope, but otherwise the meeting was "completely unrehearsed."

After Cardinal O'Malley introduced the five victims, the pope met with each for several minutes, conversing softly and clasping their hands.

Ms. Johnston, who had not planned what to say, burst into tears when her turn came.

"He congratulated me about my upcoming wedding, told me he'd pray for me and my future husband and talked about the hope of the family," she said. "The rest is kind of a blur."

Mr. McDaid, who gave the pope a loaf of his mother's homemade Irish bread, told him how as an altar boy of 12, "I was praying, doing a most sacred thing, when I got sexually assaulted."

At that point, Mr. McDaid recalled, the pope "looked in my eyes and squeezed my hand."

The group also gave the pope a hand-bound, color-washed book with the names of nearly 1,500 people from Boston who have claimed abuse at the hands of priests. The archdiocese hired a calligrapher to print the names in the book, which was assembled just for the pope, Father Connolly said.

"He told us that he prays for survivors every day," Father Connolly said, "and now he has a tangible element."